I just read the Oct. Nitty Gritty regarding friendships in the church you pastor at.
Wow! Very good and so very true. I do agree that the "Maria's" are rare! I have personally broken all the guidelines in having a very close friend in the church. However, at church we hardly talk. We feel it's best this way because that way no one really knows how close we are! We mostly talk on the phone and share very personal matters. We are not "out and about" together either. We are also totally opposite in our looks and personality. No one would imagine that we'd have so much in common! But God sees the heart and He knew we needed eachother. So, in the truest sense of the word: We're Secret Sisters! (smile)
So far, I have not sensed any familarity or disrespect. However, she does know the pain I have experienced in the church with people who refuse to treat me as their pastor or as an authority. But the article, Pastor Deanna, was a gentle reminder to me to be careful still. I am a very transparent and open lady. It can work against me. Thanks for your wisdom, encouragement, and open heart.
My mom is best friends with her pastor's wife...they've been friends for almost 20 years! I used to get upset and defensive when I would hear people say, "Pastors/pastors' wives shouldn't be close friends with members of the congregation." But I am realizing more and more that my mom is the exception, not the rule! She is an "armor bearer" in every sense of the word...but as a pastor, I need to look at the big picture and realize that just because that particular friendship clicked, it doesn't mean that I should let my guard down...
