After 10 years and many different fractions within the church, I just don't care to work very hard to make friends here after trying for 10 years. This church is very clicky and hard to fit in with certain groups. I feel there is no one I can trust or reach out to. After an 11 day mission trip a few years ago with 12 people from the church, we still don't fit in. Usually an event such as this brings people very close together, not this bunch. I really hate going to church every Sunday and pray my husband is called somewhere else, but there aren't many opportunities where we live. We don't want to move because of owning our own home and our grown children live near us. As a pastor's wife here I don't remember ever being encouraged in any way by church members except for a couple of older couples that like the pastor and they include me. No couples are age want to have anything to do with me. Help, I think I'm going crazy.