I have a few scriptures I am pondering on. I have not drawn any specific thing from each one. I am trying to disect them and to be honest. I dont know if there is something I am unconsciously looking for or not. But, I am looking at 1Tim 3 and looking at the whole passage about a pastors wife. I have been reading commentary on this passage. i am also looking at the phrase in prov. 31 about "her husband and child rise up and call her blessed" Does anyone have any insight you would like to share on these two things. There is something I need released in me. I want to do EVERYTHING i do to please the Lord and not to impress people. So do these scriptures tie into that? Or is there something else I should see here? Right now, some of the things I am doing and trying to do is because I am trying to be what I "ought to" be or what I "should do". I had a great time of prayer night before last and I walked away telling the Lord, "I am so busy using the word and chrisitanity to try and change me that i dont know how to just enjoy You anymore!" have any of you been there and done that? If so, would you please describe your tshirt? lol
Gonna be alittle more specific as I have been thinking on this some more as the day has gone on. That passage in Timothy talks about all the qualifications for a bishop and deacon and their wives. It talks about everyone speaking well of them. So, in a world where its already hard to not do things because we are worried about what people will think, how do we interpret this verse. Surely God is not condoning the fear of man and striving for peoples approval that we are trying to escape? how do you ladies read this....I am genuinely just chewing on this....Interested in your thoughts.
Fear of man drives people to become unsecure and an approval seeker. God's desire is to mirror who He is in us to whomever is arouind us. You are who you are in Christ, not what people expect you to be. Yes, there are certian things that are to be followed..honesty, faithfulness, dedication, etc. You are just as called as your husband is! "Her husband and child rise up and call her blessed" not just for what she can do for others, or how "good" she make look, but because she is serving God with the best that she is and with the gifts that she was given by God. Not every woman will be a look alike..not every woman will preach and speak the way others will. God has called you to be you, and the more you let God speak to your heart about what He has created you to be, the more you will find contentment in Him and your calling.
Thanks for your reply and thoughts. I have been mulling all this over for days I tell you. One thing that was a light bulb moment to me was realizing the meaning behind that verse and pardon for not having the reference. But where it says man looks at the outside but God looks at the heart. Well, God was not saying "well...that is what man looks at so you better focus on the outside." No he is saying that may be waht man judges by but not Him therefore DON't focus on the outside. Focus on the inside but we are not to neglect the outside as well. Even Jesus told the pharisees that they washed the outside of their vessel but inside they were like dry bones.
Very natural example here...I had a lady in our church...precious lady....but she came to our door today (she lives just a block or two down from us). Well, the door bell is out of order. So, I never heard her ring it but I happened to walk by the window and saw her as she was walking off. I froze. i was not about to run to the door and say "hey come on in!" It was early in the day, I was still in my exercise clothes (though I didnt exercise ugh) didnt have my self all fixed up. I feel bad because I dont always look 100% presentable 100% of the time. I am not always wanting to throw my doors open and entertain folks. yet, i know I am supposed to be hospitable. So...I feel mixed and torn. Like I am not doing something right. But, little would anyone know that hubby and I had just finished awesome prayer and devo time together (along with some great coffee). So I hadnt had time to get cleaned up. I had to go right into whipping up breakfast and cleaning that up. so...if I have to do everything perfect I give up now cause I would need to get up at four and not go to bed til 3. :( And not to mention be sweet to everyone all the while. Just being honest here. So...I started digging in these scriptures to try and find some answers to "fix" me yet all I find is more questions. But, I am not down and out about it. Just having a few days back to back with dr's telling me I am not feeding one kid enough and giving her enough to drink and another telling me I am over feeding one and all on the wrong foods. So, I feel about this high (imagine me doing the inch tall thing with m finger and thumb) as a mom and housekeeping...well, I do ok except on laundry. hate it. ok. I am done venting. :)
Listening to your story about the woman who came to visit unannounced sounds like what happens to us all the time. Up until a year ago I was always striving to be on top of my game. I stress striving cause its hard to be on top of things with 4 children under 7 w/2 who are twin 4 yr olds. Then one small mole hole started a year long endevour to fix my knees. They are still not fixed, I am in constant pain and I mean past the scale of 1-10, 10 being the worse. I am on constant strong pain meds in order to walk. This all started since Jan when I had my first knee surgery. I still get people who call at the most inconvient times, and stop by at the most inconvient times such as this morning...just out of the shower barely dressed trying desperately to find my robe and my 4 yr old son lets our neighbor in. Had I not heard the door I would have walked around the corner half dressed. Thankfully I grabbed my husbands robe and informed our neighbor to go to the church to find my husband. I wanted to string up my son for even answering the door. Since jan my striving has completely vanished. If someone stops by they hav eto understand that I may not be perfect..hair done, make up on, I may be in my most grungiest of shorts and tshirts and my house may look like 4 super tornadoes have blown through...which is the case on most days. If they want to come unnanounced then they have to expect things to be as they are. I struggle with the outward apprearance alot when it comes to my home and myself. I too have to constantly remind myself that god doesn't care what the package may look like He is more concerned with what is in side the package! Hang in there! I have had enough experience with Doctors telling me what I am doing wrong with my kids to write a book. Sometimes you just have to go with your gut feeling and pray for God to cover the rest when it comes to our kids. Praying for better days and clarity of scripture for you. Melissa
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"How can I keep from Praising Your Name, How can I ever say enough, How amazing is Your Love!"
I totally agree with what the other ladies have said here.
We do want people to speak well of us, and we do want our children to rise up and call us blessed. However, for what? I submit to you that it's for being ourselves and who God has created us to be, not for copying someone else. The Proverbs 31 woman I'm created to be might not (and probably isn't) the Proverbs 31 woman you're created to be. It looks different on all of us. We all have different personalities, gifts, talents, etc.
We are walking in our calling when we live out who God has made us to be - not a cookie cutter of somebody else.
This is a real journey to liberate yourself from this, I know. Recently I did a blog post about me giving up the quest to be "sister so and so". As pastors we do a lot of funerals. At some of these funerals I would hear eulogies of sis so and so and how she never spoke a cross word, had nothing but encouragement that flowed out of her mouth 24/7, was a meek and gentle spirit, yada yada yada and would think, "okay, if somebody is going to say any of this about me I'm going to have a lot of changing to do before my funeral..." But then I realized, a few things.........
1) People tend to look at things through rose colored glasses when it comes to people's funerals and eulogies... 2) Sis so and so DID have "less than perfect" days but they conveniently didn't bring those up, forgot about them, or never knew because... 3) Lots of sis so and so's hid who they were from people and weren't ever "real" in public.
I'm not trying to be sis so and so anymore..........I'm just myself. With that said, I know that as "myself" I need to cultivate the fruit of the spirit and strive to be a person of character. But with what, realize that........I am also human.
Right now I'm sitting in my bed.
It's 11:23 and I'm not dressed yet.
It' s my day off.
I slept in.
I'm sitting here with a cup of tea, typing to you on the computer.
