Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
Post Info TOPIC: New Church - are ALL really welcome?


Status: Offline
Posts: 44
Date:
New Church - are ALL really welcome?


So we are touting the new church (fellowship) in the community.  Come as you are.  Trying to reach the un-churched, or those burned by strict legalistic pasts. 

However, a particular woman and her husband have shown up a few times... and I fear the hindrance she may bring.  She's been "asked to leave" 3 other churches in town for causing trouble, suing leadership, harrassing other members at their homes.  Her children won't talk to her - her own mother has a restraining order out against her.  She has multiple charges against her... you get the picture. 

Yet, I cannot pick and choose who God brings into our church.  The woman needs much prayer, but we are so new.  So of course we are praying for God's direction and protection, and that He will send whom He will.  But Any advice (and lots of prayers) are appreciated!!

confused

__________________
Rejoicing in HOPE, patient in tribulation, continuing steadfastly in prayer (Romans 12:12)


Status: Offline
Posts: 166
Date:

Hi !  The Christian Law Association gives free legal advice to Senior Pastors (try to google them).  If you can't get a number, I will try to get it to you or on this post. They have helped our church very much over the past 13 yrs. Having clear church policies/procedures and by laws is a proactive way to handle many sticky situations. Do background checks before letting people be in children's ministry too.
 
If the person were to do any of the things that you have mentioned and your church is on private property, you have the right to call the police have them take care of it and have her escorted off the property with a restraining order for her not to return again.  This would be in the best interest of the people/children involved.  

Prayerful discernment and spiritual warfare will help you take one service at a time.  I will pray for you too!  A clear emergency plan should be in place that leadership is well aware of or department heads (i.e. lock-in, silent alarm, etc.)
A gunman was loose outside of a church here and they had a well thought out proactive plan.  There was a lock-down until word came that the gun man had been apprehended.  These are the kind of days we live/minister in.  Be wise as serpeants, harmless as doves. No weapon formed against us shall prosper !
 


-- Edited by TwoAsOne at 18:00, 2008-01-26

__________________


Status: Offline
Posts: 1000
Date:

I am very careful with people like this - I learned the hard way through some circumstances years ago.

First of all, put very clear boundaries up between you and this woman.  In such cases, I'm extremely professional and don't let my guard down.  With people like this I usually have a "handshake and greeting" at the back door relationship, but don't do anything personal.  If they e-mail me, I give short quick responses.  I don't spend time alone with them.  Always have an armor bearer alongside you to assist you.  As far as counsel, I would not give it to her if asked - I'd refer.  Don't get "personally tied in" with her...there is a reason you should not or she wouldn't have been asked to leave 3 other churches. 

With such people the extent of my ministry to them is from the pulpit or praying for them at the altar, with others there to assist me. 

Yes you do want to be a "come as you are" church (we're the same way) however you don't want to leave yourself wide open for attack.  Just because she's "coming like she is" doesn't mean she needs a close personal in with you, or to receive ministry exclusively from you.

Hope this helps - we'll be praying...


__________________

Co-Pastor, Celebration Church of Tampa



Status: Offline
Posts: 166
Date:

Good insights!  God Bless!

__________________


Status: Offline
Posts: 44
Date:

Sure enough, she and her husband showed up yesterday morning.  Immediately after the service ended, she dominated the attention of everyone in the chapel, basically blocking the door.  Talking and talking and talking about herself and how God is using her.... she would make a statement, then look at me really weird and ask, "Isn't that right?"  Like she was testing me or something.  I got a very uneasy vibe off of her...  I politely told her I had to leave for an appointment 4 times, and finally had to push my way out around her. 

I hestitate to say too much until I get to know you all better... but twice she reached out to touch me, and I will only say it wasn't "right".  I'm a pretty touchy-feely person, but this was done in the wrong spirit.  Her husband finally went out to the car, but she stayed on, talking and cornering people (mainly me). 

I know Satan sends and plants his people in churches.  Just knowing the trouble she's stirred up all over town makes me believe she is there for no good purpose.  Her eyes were so dark and cold...  just an eery vibe. 

I constantly pray for discernment... and last night those present prayed together (spiritual warfare) against whatever may be coming against our new church start-up/ministry. 

I won't go as far as to say she's casting spells ashamed, but last Wednesday she moved 3 times to sit behind a young girl who has just started coming.  Kept reaching up playing with her hair during service!  The girl came to me afterwards and was VERY disturbed - nobody knows this woman.  It's an odd situation, at best.

But we are armored up, and will stand against anything or anyone sent to disrupt our work for the Lord.  I SO appreciate your prayers and advice.

-- Edited by Sister Robin at 15:46, 2008-01-28

__________________
Rejoicing in HOPE, patient in tribulation, continuing steadfastly in prayer (Romans 12:12)


Status: Offline
Posts: 44
Date:

Oh, and now she wants me to take time off work to go with her out of state for a passion play up at Pigeon Forge in March. I don't know this woman! She said she would pay for the room and we could ride up together.

I told her thanks, but... NO.

Am I over-reacting?

__________________
Rejoicing in HOPE, patient in tribulation, continuing steadfastly in prayer (Romans 12:12)


Status: Offline
Posts: 709
Date:

I definitely don't think you're over-reacting!!

If you don't want to go...don't.

I think that we in the ministry have the mentality too often that we need to accept every single invitation that is extended to us.

Whether you get a bad vibe from this woman (which is reason enough to say no, anyway!), or if you just plain don't have the time or the desire to go, it definitely does not fall within your job description as a pastor to drop everything and go on this trip.

If she really wants to be your "buddy," then she'll respect your decision. But my feeling is that she is not trying to be your friend as much as she is trying to get in good with the pastor. People like that are generally one of two things:

1. Flaky - they'll come in, promise friendship...help in the ministry...support...whatever, but then in a few months, they'll be "led by the Lord" to go somewhere else and leave you high and dry, or;

2. Dangerous and manipulative - which, from your description of this woman, sounds to be more the case.

Either way, this is NOT the type of person you want as a friend!!!

__________________


Status: Offline
Posts: 1000
Date:

Absolutely NOT...you are not overreacting, and absolutely not, if I were you I would NOT go with this woman to Pigeon Forge or ANYWHERE.  She sounds like a nutcase.

For sure I know I'm dealing with trouble when someone comes in and right away wants to be my "best friend". 

The whole sitting behind that girl and playing with her hair thing is just creepy.

And...by the way, I'm a "huggy" person - as you described, but this kind of thing, no, no, no that's not the same thing...

Keep your distance...


__________________

Co-Pastor, Celebration Church of Tampa



Status: Offline
Posts: 19
Date:

I totally agree, no no no!
I wish I had this forum years ago, would have stop me from having a broken heart and spirit many times over. I pray that your church goes from strength to strength. love always me

__________________
Deborah - Itinerant woman's minister


Status: Offline
Posts: 166
Date:

At a pw conference called Free To Soar, Pastor Sharon Daughtery shared on: Loving With Discernment.  Her point was illustrated by a personal story of a woman who started visiting their church. The lady dressed very seductive and would sit on the front row nearest to the preacher.  After service a couple of times she slipped the SP a note wanting him to call her.  Pastor Sharon and her SP husband, phoned this lady to let her know they don't think this is the church for her and she needs to find somewhere else where she would be happy.  Both the wife/husband were on the phone to set this straight.

We are woman of grace.  We're to be kind, gentle, and courteous.  Nevertheless, we are also women of God who are to speak the truth in love, test the spirits, be discerning, and  not be gullible.  Our prayer life really matters as does our own personal relationship with Jesus. .  .  so we can hear his voice and make wise choices.  People lie right to our faces and we need to know it.  Their motives can be all wrong but God can protect us with a word of knowledge, wisdom, etc.  We need His Help.



__________________


Status: Offline
Posts: 44
Date:

Quick update -

Thanks so much for prayers and advice. We fervently prayed for discernment and PROTECTION against this woman, if her intentions were not good. She hasn't been back since. I pray FOR her, but against whatever evil intentions she brought with her.

God is our shield.

__________________
Rejoicing in HOPE, patient in tribulation, continuing steadfastly in prayer (Romans 12:12)
Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.

Tweet this page Post to Digg Post to Del.icio.us


Create your own FREE Forum
Report Abuse
Powered by ActiveBoard