I am feeling mostly good today. God has given me such peace that I am smiling and enjoying my life even in the midst of trying times. It has truly been a blessed today.
Last night the members at our church had a meeting, without my dh and I knowing about it, and they voted us out. I was glad because I am tired of dealing with the craziness and the abuse. My dh was upset about how things were done, but he feels relieved. He was ready to be released from this place and ready to move into a new season.
I feel glad because I had been telling my husband over the past week that it was time for a change. This ministry was beginning to cause stress in our marriage and our family, and it was just time for a change. Last night when they called to tell us what happened, my husband was asleep so I had to take the call. When I asked if I could inquire as to why the decision was made, I was not given a single scriptural or biblical reason. Not one. I was given reasons like because my dh slammed the door in someone’s face. The best they could come up with was that the church was not growing like they thought it should. Considering the amount of rebellion in the church, that was not a shock. It was not growing how we wanted it to either, but in the last month we have had 6 people to join and 7 to get saved. One young man got saved and joined the church on Sunday. Another young lady emailed my husband and I yesterday stating that she wanted to join the church.
The only problem is that there are innocent victims in this whole scenario. As we have discussed many times before, pastoring is a lot like parenting. I feel like someone has taken my children away. It feels like someone abducted those who truly were our sons and daughters. Some rebellious people who were the leaders of the chain gang were never our children. I do not feel anything towards them, good, or bad. I don’t know what to do about this.
We have a young couple who are newly saved and they are getting married next month. They were not even at the meeting when they voted. I do not even know if they know what is going on. One of the older women cried like a baby this morning when my husband spoke with her. There are other situations similar to this. What do we say to people like these? This is the only struggle that I am having with this whole ordeal. I am going to continue to pray for our spiritual children, but I am a very hands-on person. I feel somewhat helpless.
I am sorry that you are going through this. Larry and I too have been subject to pastoral abuse in our past, and situations likened to what you describe. I understand and so do lots of other people -- more than you would ever dream. You are not alone.
You are right, it's time for a new season. It hurts to lose your children. The ones that are truly yours will always be yours. Perhaps just in your heart for a time...but in the future, I can safely predict that they will contact you and let you know how you changed their lives forever. Some carnal (actually lawless) people may be able to remove you from their midst, but they cannot remove you from your children's hearts. They can remove you out of the situation physically, perhaps, yet they cannot remove you from people's hearts.
What should you do? First, it's good that you see the need to move on. Don't live in that abuse. I'll tell you what someone very wise told me...they told me that once I got out of the abusive situation I was in, it would be like a toothache that had been hurting for a long time, yet I had gotten used to the pain. I thought it was normal. (Much like an abused wife or child can actually begin to think that the way they live, what they undergo, is normal.) IT'S NOT NORMAL, AND YOU DON'T NEED IT. Like the toothache...until it is removed from your life, you don't even realize how much you were hurting and how good it feels to be free! Until I was out of my abusive situation, I didn't know just how abused I was!!! So... What should you do? Move on into your destiny. Go where you are celebrated, not tolerated. There is a place that will welcome you with open arms, appreciate you, allow you to be the set man and woman of the house, the Momma & Daddy, and give you freedom to lead them.
What should you do? Take time to grieve...let it out...talk to those in ministry whom you trust.
What can you do right now for the children left behind? Nothing. You cannot go to them unless they come to you...be silent until they call. When they do...give them your love, your encouragement.
God always vidicates the righteous. A book I highly recommend to you is, "When Shepherds Bleed" by T.D. Jakes.
I read your post and my heart went out to you! We, too, like Deanna have also been through similar pain. My husband and I left a church recently that had a pulled the "secret meeting" and "telephone campaign" scheme. We chose to leave because we did not want to be in the middle of obvious discension- it really had very little to do with us- and much to do with divided board and politics. However, without digging up dead bones- let me tell you- there IS a light on the other side!
God spoke clearly to Craig and I that we were to rest, weather the storm and take refuge in HIM- but that we were NOT to run. We did this- and just as Deanna has told you- we had our true spiritual sons and daughters come to us. We started a work here in this area at the beginning of August and are now running around 50 regularly. We've gained families other than those who came through the church we left. We have guests every week. Our heart is to touch our region- and God has been using WHOC mightily through servant evangelism- as a matter of fact- it has gotten attention that gave us a front page article with two large full color photos in the Religion Section of our paper last Saturday. That was such a God thing- and we are so excited. We have had tremendous response from it!
Know that the vision God has placed in you and your husband is not and was not WRONG- but rejected by a people who refused to catch the vision that God had given their set man & woman- but don't give up! You will find another place where that vision will be fulfilled- those people just missed out on being a part of it. Like Deanna, I've told numerous people throughout our ministry- and recently myself- that you sould go where you are celebrated- not tolerated. God has given you a message and a heart to do His will- do not let small minded people get in your way.
As far as your spiritual "babies"- continue to pray- a sheep will know its shepherd's voice- they will come to you. And don't be surprsied if you start getting calls from others too- just use wisdom and smother those who hurt you with the love of Christ- it's amazing but, I think you will find that you had more for you than against- it just takes some people a little longer to take off their blinders and see through the eyes of God and not through the "smoke screens" of man-
I'm so proud of you guys! Woweeeee....you've been through the ringer but you're coming out "as silver refined", as the Word declares. I am so glad things are going as they are for you.
BTW, I owe you a gigantic e-mail or phone call. (Sorry...)
And by the way, I just have one thing to say, what's up with leaving Florida for Alabama and leaving me with Charley, Frances and now IVAN??!!!!
I love you, and I've never forgotten our pact on the bus!!!!!
I was given reasons like because my dh slammed the door in someone’s face. The best they could come up with was that the church was not growing like they thought it should. Considering the amount of rebellion in the church, that was not a shock. 
It was not growing how we wanted it to either, but in the last month we have had 6 people to join and 7 to get saved. One young man got saved and joined the church on Sunday. Another young lady emailed my husband and I yesterday stating that she wanted to join the church. 
