I've never ministered in any size church other than a small one, so I have no frame of reference for this...
Does the children's pastor typically run the nursery program, too?
I ask because the WIFE of the previous CP used to do all the nursery coordination...which was fine, because she was a.) a stay-at-home mom, and b.) the mom of a baby and a toddler, so she was quite familiar with all things "baby." Now that I'm here, that responsibility falls under my job description.
I am neither "stay-at-home" or a mom. My DH works full time on top of being involved with my ministry - I can't ask him to do it! So, where the former CP didn't even have to think about that aspect of the children's ministry, I do - because I don't have a cute little "wife" at home who has the time to coordinate that part of the ministry.
I know that I am the first woman they've had on staff whose husband ISN'T also on staff as a pastor in another area, so this is new territory for them as well as for me. I guess I'm wondering if I should consider this a red flag (as in, I'm not being taken seriously as a pastor of the church!). I'm not agonizing over it - but I came out of an extremely bad situation and any bad day here is 1,000 times better than any good day I had before. So I guess I need a little perspective and feedback from others who have worked in larger churches...
Yes, that is in the job description of our children's pastor. He is technically over ALL children birth through the age of going into the youth group, so that would include the nursery. I think the reason you have witnessed CP's wives doing it is because sometimes they delegate it to their wives, but if those wives did not do that, the husband would have to find somebody. In our case, our CP is responsible. Whether he gets his wife to help or not is up to him. His wife helps him in most all things. They have a few ladies who help them to coordinate the nursery however the buck stops with them (the CP and wife) and it is their responsibility to train and equip someone to take the position. And, they would be over that person who is in the position. If they do not appoint someone to the position or there is a transition from that person to another, they have to step in and handle it until such time as they get another person. In our church, ALL children's workers (nursery, royal rangers, missionettes, etc.) report to our CP. My husband hardly deals with them except for "all church trainings" type things. They all report to the CP with any questions, needs, etc. and he handles recruiting new teachers, workers, and training them. As soon as the kids go into middle school, then the YP is over them. All youth workers report to our YP. Again, my husband does not deal with them unless it's an all church training or leadership meeting in which case we are all together but it's most general "leadership" teachings that we do.
Do not take this as a red flag. It's like this in many churches. The thinking is -- the children's pastor is the lead pastor over all children's ministries and as such coordinates them. Babies are the littlest children in the church but no less important. It's not about a "stay at home mom" thing, it's about overseeing all of the children's ministries, and in many cases, the wives have just helped their hubbies out.
The name of the game for you is to TRAIN AND EQUIP and get someone in there ASAP. Then build your bench as much as possible. For instance, our CP has several ladies in leadership so if one of them quits, this does not rest on him alone, he has someone else to call on to help lead.
I think many CP's think (when they go into ministry) that it's just about "doing children's church" but it's so much more than that. If there's one person my husband could not do without it's the CP. Without a CP, the pastor is taken up with needless calls on everything from curriculum to discipline, to background check stuff, etc. DH used to have all that on his back, but with our children's pastor, it frees him up incredibly for adult ministry. Please note that I am not saying that our CP is royal ranger commander or missionette coordinator! We have two excellent people in those lead roles, in fact they are both leaders over the Tampa Bay area as well, but...they both report to our CP for EVERYTHING. Anything they need from crayons for their classroom, to permission to take a field trip, they talk to him.
The name of the game for the SP is initially train and equip their guts out, to grow the church to the point where he/she can have staff to oversee these areas instead of him having to continue it. The name of the game for the staff he/she hires is to train and equip and build their benches deep so that they are overseeing those in these ministries, not "doing them." Hope this helps answer your question.
I absolutely agree that babies and toddlers ARE still a part of the children's ministry - in fact, at our church, they even do worship (with little hand-held instruments!) and a short teaching and craft/coloring page with the toddlers. DH and I are also going to plan a get-together for everyone who works with the early childhood program so that they feel like part of the children's ministry team, and not just the church babysitters.
I was just a little paranoid because of the female pastor thing. In our last church (yeah, I know - night and day comparison, and I should know better, lol!!), people threw a fit because YP and I did not commit to a kitchen team! We tried to explain that we have other obligations during services (like, uh...runnning kids' church for me, and being available to pray with the teenagers for her!), and that we're more than happy to help out if we're available and they need the extra help - but the attitude was, "But you're women of the church...women of the church are supposed to be on a kitchen team!"
It's good to know that it IS standard procedure to have the CP in charge of the nursery program...male or female!! Once again...hello, functionality .